Sexual violence affects millions across the globe, shattering the lives of women, men and children. The following personal account is the first in a series of five on the topic of sexual violence. It is about a 15-year-old girl from Colombia, who tells about the stigma of being raped and having an abortion.
Girl, 15, Quibdo, Colombia
The man lived next to us. We used the same bathroom as him, it was a shared bathroom. I was home alone; it was in the morning before I had to leave for school. I was washing and he saw me and came into the house. My little sister had damaged our TV plug, so he told me to come in and have a look at the TV. So I came in with a chair and as I was sitting down he came close to me, grabbed my arms and tried to make me sit on the bed. I said that I wouldn’t sit on his bed as it was disrespectful. He insisted and then I did, I sat on his bed. He jumped on top of me and started holding my hands and I said, “Don’t do it!”
MSF staff conduct consultations in Jazmin, Quibdo. Colombia, 2007.
Francesco Zizola
I didn’t want to tell anybody. But I started to feel very sick and vomit all the time. I would feel sick at the smell of food, even the smell of the flowers from my sister’s wedding would make me sick. My older sister and my mum then decided to take me to see a doctor. During the appointment the doctor did a test and told me I was pregnant. My sister asked, “Whose baby is it?” and I kept saying, “I don’t know!” Then she asked about the man who lived next to our house and I threw up right there. My mum started to cry and I started to cry too. Then I told them what happened; that he took me by force and threw me on the bed by force.
After I learned I was pregnant I was devastated. That man abused me and it ended in pregnancy! I was very angry at him and I cried all the time. I didn’t want to keep the baby. All I wanted to do was to carry on with my studies and if I had a child at 13, it would destroy my dreams. But it was a difficult decision.
I didn’t want to leave the house anymore. People would walk past me and look at me in a strange way. Everybody knew I had been abused. I even wanted to commit suicide. After what happened, some girls who were my friends before started calling me “la abortadora” (the aborter). Nobody wanted to sit next to me in school, and when we had to do group assignments nobody wanted me in their groups. Even one of my teachers disrespected me. She said it was wrong to have an abortion. I didn’t like that. I don’t like it when people judge me. That’s why I ended up leaving that school and going to another one. I was a very good student.
Today, part of me feels happy because I was able [to] continue with my studies. That was the most important thing to me. But of course, another part of me is sad because of everything that happened. I have a little baby niece and when I see everybody holding her, stroking her, it makes me think of the baby that I didn’t have.
My neighbour disappeared after what he did to me. I had the impression I saw him once, when I was on the bus to school, but I’m not sure if it was really him. He was walking down the street with a woman and a baby, so maybe he had a child. When I saw him my heart started beating fast. I was nervous and I could feel all that rage coming back to me.
I want to thank MSF for the support you gave me and also for letting me tell my story. I feel strong now. I want people to know what happened to me.
Burundi
Through a 25-year-old female patient's words, Dr Vastine Toyota Niyonsenga explains the importance of the Seruka Centre’s awareness-raising work. To read this account, click here.
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To download the report, Shattered lives: Immediate medical care vital for sexual violence victims, click here.
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To watch a short video containing interviews with victims of sexual violence in Burundi, Colombia and Liberia, as well as with MSF staff who provide medical and pychological support to victims of such violence, click here.
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To hear testimonies of rape victims from Burundi and find out how MSF was able to help them, click here.
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To learn more about sexual violence, click here.
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